"...When He [Jesus] saw the crowds, he had compassion for them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd." Matt 9:36

"Do not rob the poor, because he is poor... for the Lord will take up their case and plunder those who plunder them." Proverbs 22:22-23

Friday, November 21, 2014

David Hughes to Teach Pastors on Topic "Transitioning Without Body Bags"

The Watchdog does like to report some positive news every now and then, so I am happy to announce to church members in Florida that David Hughes, pastor of Church By the Glades will be teaching pastors in December on the topic "Transitioning [a Church] Without Body Bags".

It is not surprising that David Hughes - who described disgruntled, exiting church members as excrement leaving the church's "back door" - is connected to Ed Young. David is speaking December 11 at Ed Young's "C3 Global Round Table" in Orlando, Florida. 

And David's topic is how to transition a dysfunctional church "while retaining and honoring the existing members/staff."  And take notice also: John Cross is speaking. Remember John Cross - the one who gave the most embarrassing defense of Ed Young to Ed's church members right after the jet scandal in 2010? Well, ole John will be teaching Florida pastors at the round table as well.

Maybe David will share his mouth/anus metaphor with other pastors, so they too can view their disgruntled church members as human excrement. That might be one of the keys to help pastors "transition" (whatever that means) their church. Will be very interesting to hear what metaphor goes with the "body bags" in David's portion of the event.

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

SBC Pastor, David Hughes, Refers to Ex-Church Members as Pieces of Human Excrement

In the sermon excerpt below from David Hughes, pastor of "Church by the Glades" in Coral Springs, Florida, David tells his church members about the church's "back door".  And since the New Testament uses the body/church metaphor, David thought it a good idea to extend the metaphor to churches having a mouth and an anus (the back door) like the human body. And the church members who are not happy, and who ultimately leave the church, like human excrement, they are excreted out the "back door", or the anus, of the church.

Yes, his ex-church members are like human excrement, pooped out as harmful waste from the church's anus. What a wholesome picture, and sound biblical analysis from this "man of God". Maybe if David is looking for the anus of the church, he should look in the mirror.

I first learned about this from Chris Rosebrough's 11/18/14 podcast, and from the Pulpit and Pen blog here.

David thinks he's being cute and hip and cool by referring to a dose of Ex-lax to purge the excrement members out of the anus of the church - but I hope some of David's church members see the manipulation and indeed head out the back door.


And as you see in the video, he tells the remaining church members to not be upset that some members leave, because their exit is proof that they didn't need them in their lives anyways. Pure manipulation.

And more on David Hughes to come - as we cover some of his nutty tithing teachings from his October series on money and tithing.

Happy Thanksgiving to all the Watchdog readers, as we move into our 8th year - or 56th in Watchdog years.

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Perry Noble and NewSpring Kick-Off the Tithing Season with Parody of Themselves!!

Below is a parody video that NewSpring Church has posted on their website to introduce Perry Noble's new sermon series entitled "The Church Just Wants Your Money". Some of the "best" (i.e. worst) teachings on money in mega churches come in September/October, so we are glad to see Perry is kicking things off with a bang! (The all time best/worst was Ed Young's tithing long bomb back in 2010 here and here.)

On one hand this is some masterful marketing. Not a bad idea to deflect criticism about Perry Noble's nutty tithing teachings by making a parody video and a series based on the church just wanting your money. Truth is the problem with Perry is not that they "just want your money"...it is the ridiculous teachings that Perry uses to convince Christians that if they want God's blessings - in fact if they want to avoid a CURSE from God himself - they must give 10% of their money to Perry's church.

And really, that is NOT funny. So NewSpring church members - there really is nothing humorous about what Perry is going to teach you. It is not something to make light of. If you actually believe what Perry will teach you about tithing and you follow his teaching on "redeeming" your income, that 10% of your income is required, etc. etc., it can do much harm to you and your family.

Perry addressed his new sermon series here at his blog, and the Christian Post wrote an article about the series here. They both miss the point about Perry's teachings on money - it is not that Perry teaches ABOUT money or that he enjoys taking an offering - it is WHAT Perry teaches about money that is noteworthy. His latest nonsense I wrote about here, where Perry linked non-tithers to Judas betraying Jesus by saying,

"Technically, Judas betrayed Jesus over tithe money." 

and

"When it comes to your finances, they are either blessed by God, or cursed by God, there is no middle ground..."

Perry will stop at nothing to convince his church members that they MUST give 10% of their gross income to his church or they will be cursed by God.

Bottom line: Perry really is his own parody. To study Perry's teaching on money is itself a lampoon of church finances. Go here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here and here and you'll see what I mean. Or just type in "Perry Noble" in the Watchdog search, and you'll see even more.

So the Watchdog is at the ready to examine Perry's parody series of his own silliness when it comes to finances. 

Monday, September 8, 2014

Prestonwood Baptist Brings in J. John to Preach His Doughnut Tithing Nonsense

Well, Prestonwood Baptist and Pastor Jack Graham have joined the first-fruits, tithe-redeeming crowd in the SBC that says Christians must give the first 10% of their income in order to "redeem" the remaining 90% - thereby magically making it more valuable than the entire 100%...and if you need more money, God will magically get other people to give you money.

But it wasn't Jack himself who delivered the message to the Prestonwood faithful, it was a guy named "J. John", a British evangelist who became popular a few years back with his "Just 10" sermon series on the Ten Commandments.

To convince Prestonwood members they need to tithe, "J. John" uses a "doughnut" analogy to tell everyone at Prestonwood that they all get "10 doughnuts" each week, and that "God owns all the doughnuts" and the value of each doughnut varies from person to person.

Says J. John:
"God says: 'If you're a follower of Jesus, you take one of the doughnuts and you take it to your church where you belong to, and you offer it to the church, as an act of worship."


At least J. John doesn't misuse scripture in his tithing lies - he just references no bible verses at all. J. John just apparently knows the mind of God and tells everyone what "God says".

And since "God owns all the doughnuts", J. John says that Christians should "stop complaining" that they have to give one of them back to the church.

J. John goes further, and tries the old "the tithe redeems the other 90% of your income" trick. He says that your doughnuts are "secular" when you earn them, but by giving one of the doughnuts they all magically become "sacred".
"Those doughnuts are secular. When you take the secular doughnut and you give it the church you belong to...that doughnut becomes sacred. When that doughnut becomes sacred, the other nine doughnuts become sacred. Nine sacred doughnuts are worth more than ten secular ones."
Secular and sacred doughnuts. Is it any wonder people are leaving churches? If these guys tell fantastic stories and fables about magical money - why would anyone believe ANYTHING ELSE they are saying about ANYTHING?

And to really lay it on thick, according to J. John, if you give 10%, God will magically make people give you more money if you need it:
"When we've got nine doughnuts, if we do need more doughnuts, and God knows we need them, he'll make other people give us a few doughnuts. It's amazing how it works..."
Yeah, right. It's amazing how it works, all right. How it works is this: J. John is a hired gun to convince people to give money to the church or ministry that hires him.

In this case, it was Jack Graham who hired J. John. A few years ago, it was Joyce Meyer who hired J. John.

In the video above, you'll see that J. John spoke at a Joyce Meyer conference and used the same doughnut illustration. Except at the end, he said the following, and it was in all seriousness:
"There are thousands of us here who don't even need nine [doughnuts]. So what does God say? Right. 'I want you to give a doughnut to Joyce Meyer so she can go on TV every day. So you give one of your doughnut sand you become a monthly supporter.'"
There you have it. J. John is hired by Joyce Meyer to tell the women at her conference that God says to give one of their doughnuts to Joyce Meyer so she can be on TV.

Prestonwood members, do you feel like suckers now that you know J. John uses his tithing fable to raise money for Joyce Meyer, then comes to your church with the same fable?

Thursday, August 21, 2014

You are a Dumb Sheep! How DARE You Question the 'Man of God'!!

How dare you question the man of God??!! 

Her grammar is not perfect, but my word, this lady needs to be hired by the Southern Baptist Convention!!!