Video of Ergun Caner Getting the Call to Brewton Parker!!

Well WD readers, our old friend, the "DrErgunCaner" video spoofer is back. Below is a just-released YouTube video of Ergun Caner getting the call from Brewton Parker Trustee "Bucky" Kennedy, offering the BP presidency to Ergun. You'll get to see what the next phone call was that Ergun made after Bucky called. Hilarious stuff.

This is ground-breaking video. You've heard hot-shot pastors say "God called me" to their church, that it wasn't the job, the city, the six figure salary, or a land gift or other perks and jobs for family members. It was "God called them". Well, here you get to see how it actually works, when God actually makes the call. 

Seriously though, the Ergun Caner debacle has reached such a ridiculous stage - the denials and the defenses and the lawsuits with more to come I'm sure - that all that is left is to make the points through parody. As Rush Limbaugh has said many times, sometimes the only way to illustrate absurdity is by being absurd.

And by the way, the video below is a spoof of this real Ergun Caner video.

Welcome back, Fake Ergun Caner, after a 2-year hiatus. Thanks for helping us make the point about how ridiculous this all is, and giving us a laugh or two.

"From the Dog House to the Blog House" - The (Embellished) Life Story of Willie Vincenzo Nazzareno Antonio Watchdog, aka "FBC Jax Watchdog"

Finally, the day has come for the Watchdog to tell his story.....it's what you've been waiting for in the soon released memoirs of the Watchdog:

"From the Dog House to the Blog House" by Willie Vincenzo Nazzareno Antonio Watchdog, aka "The Hitman"

subtitled "A Former Devout Sicilian Catholic Mafia member Becomes a Warrior Southern Baptist"

Watchdog readers have long thought that the Watchdog was just some boring, run-of-the-mill, trespassed church member gone bad.  Oh, but you haven't heard the REAL Watchdog story! His name might be just FBC Jax Watchdog, but his birth name is Willie Vincenzo Nazzareno Antonio Watchdog, and he was born and raised as a strict Sicilian Catholic mafia gangster who became a Baptist as a teenager.

And it's all coming out in his new book, and will be retold (embellished) as he tours the world preaching about his old days as a devout teenage mafia gangster raised in a Catholic household and sharing his expertise on all things Catholic and mafia. And oh, can he spin a yarn!

Buy his book and you can meet the real Willie Vincenzo Watchdog, aka "The Hitman". You will laugh, you will cry, you will open your wallet as you read about his life. Willie Vincenzo Watchdog will at long last tell the compelling story of how he was raised a devout Sicilian Catholic by a strict Catholic father, and was disowned when he became a Baptist blogger at the age of somewhere between 13 and 17.

Here are some excerpts from the soon released classic - edited by Watchdog's good friend E. Michael Caner - telling the unique story of Watchdog:

"Vincenzo Antonio Watchdog was born in Norway, but was raised in Europe, Beirut, and Turkey (along the Danube River), before emigrating to Columbus, Ohio, with his Sicilian Italian Catholic Mafia boss father at the age of 12 or 13 or 14 or thereabouts. He risked it all, tearing off his strict Catholic altar boy clothing to come to America and don his Baptist tie and coat."

Hear the Watchdog "The Hitman" describe his very troubled upbringing in his own words:

"Let me tell you something, I submit to you that I was raised in the Sicilian Mafia Cosa Nostra until the age of 15 or 16 or 17 or so, when I came to America....and let me tell you something, I was raised to do the very things that were portrayed in the Godfather I, II, III, and a few of the things in 'Goodfellas' - especially the scene of the guy in the trunk. But when I came to America, I realized I didn't need to kill people anymore."

Hear how Willie Watchdog had to bear the brunt of jokes and ridicule and scorn for his Italian Sicilian Mafia upbringing:

"When I first went to church, I wasn't called 'Dago', or 'Mary worshipper', 'popeblower, 'Mackerel Snapper', or 'Al Pacino'....I got plenty of that OUTSIDE the church....they didn't care that I spoke Italian and was a killer. Oh yes, I said my Hail Marys 5 times a day in the bathroom - that's how devout I was."

And his Sicilian Italian upbringing that led him to think that Americans wanted to kill him:

"Yes, in my upbringing in Europe, Beirut, Turkey, and other mostly Italian countries, I was taught that you Americans hated me for being a Catholic. Did I say I was trained to do that which was done in Godfather I, II, and III, and some of what was done in 'Goodfellas' - especially the scene with the guy in the trunk?"

And about receiving his calling to become a Baptist blogger:

"It was shortly after I became a Baptist, though my English was still poor, though I could not speak as clearly as others, I surrendered to the ministry. I was being called by Gawd to blog - it happened during a trip on a camel up the side of a mountain in Sicily - and I knew God had called me. My brother and sister, if you are in this room, within the sound of my voice, I tell you that though I was in the Mafia, you are at war as well. Because though you are at war with God, God wants to win you, not kill you."

Wow!! What a conversion story Watchdog has to tell! You will agree, Watchdog is a true WARRIOR!!!!

So put in your advance order for the story of the Watchdog...time is short!

Stay tuned for Watchdog's upcoming books, after his star rises:

"Unveiling Catholicism: An Insider's Look at Catholicism"

"Unveiling Cosa Nostra: An Insider's Look at the Mafia"

"Unveiling False Biographies"

"Unveiling the Unveiling: An Insider's Look at Unveiling things that Need to be Unveiled"

"Veiling Your Biography: An Insider's Look at Writing a Fancy Biography to Get Good Speaking Gigs and Book Deals."

"The Art of Speaking Jibberish"

"How to Fit Your Fibs to Your Audience"

"The Rise and Fall of  Ex-Satanist Mike Warnke: Lessons on How Not to Embellish One's Testimony"

"Satellite Dish Hats, Curtain Rods, and Shoes that Match their Cars - A Humorous Look at the African American Worship Experience" [click here for context]

"More than a Pope: An Insider's Response to Catholic Beliefs"

"Mafia Jihad: Two Former Mafia Members (Watchdog and Brother Marmaduke) Look at the Crusades and Killing in the Name of Gotti"

"Why Baptist Churches Die - 101 Ways You Stupid Sheep Mess Up a Pastor's Ministry" - Written with Watchdog's Good Friend

"Out of the Sicilian Shadows: Leading Catholic Women out of the Doghouse"

Also, if you want to join Willie Vincenzo Nazzareno Watchdog on a trip to the Holy Land, including a tour of his homeland in Turkey, Norway, Italy (Sicily), and a brief "cruise down the Danube" and other areas where Watchdog was raised, STAY TUNED! Coming in April 2014!!!

Caner 2007 GBC Convention Sermon: Some Irony, Some Hypocrisy, Some Prophecy - And Yes, Some Baloney

I thought it fitting now that the Georgia Baptists have hired Ergun Caner as one of their college's presidents to go back to the last time Ergun Caner addressed the Georgia Baptist pastors and take a listen. Afterall, these pastors and their congregants will now be helping to pay Caner's salary - and maybe his legal fees - so let's go back and hear what Caner had to say to his Georgia brethren.

I dug back into the Watchdog archives and have found the sermon Ergun Caner delivered at the 2007 Georgia Baptist Evangelism Conference on September 7, 2007.

But give Caner his props - it was a real humdinger of a sermon. He he had them rolling in the aisles, and he had them amening and hootin' and hollerin'. Caner's sermon that day was a prime example of why Caner is such a popular circuit speaker.

However, in the 6 years that have transpired since he delivered it - four parts of his sermon are worth noting given recent events. There was some irony, some hypocrisy, a little bit of prophecy, and as in most Caner sermons, there was a serving of baloney.

Let's take them one by one. We shall start with the prophecy.

Prophecy: Caner warned the pastors about the bloggers "attacking" pastors.

In a bit of prophecy and foreshadowing, Caner warned about the dangers of bloggers "sowing seeds of discord among the brethren". In September 2007 when this sermon was delievered, this blog had just begun a few weeks prior, and there were several other bloggers out there such as the NewBBCOpenForum, Saving Bellevue, and another one dedicated to Two Rivers Baptist in Nashville. Caner was one of the first to be out front warning of the "evils" of bloggers. He even made a reference to bloggers in their parents' basement.

Here is an excerpt from the 51:15 mark of the sermon:

"Everybody in our church is demanding their rights and believe that their opinion is worth hearing, and they BLOG US TO DEATH. Now you need to listen to me. I've got a blog, and many of you do too. But there are those that have become infected with this narcissism. They've developed this focus on their own opinion and thus they have a spirit of dissension. They sow seeds of discord among the brethren." (51:15 mark)

Who knew when these words were uttered that it would be Caner himself who had the most to lose by those nosy and "narcissistic" bloggers? Perhaps Caner saw the day coming where HE would have his fibs posted on these same blogs and thus he decided to take a pre-emptive strike. Imagine Caner's horror when he realized that ordinary, non-ordained Christians obtained some measure of power through the blogosphere to disclose and discuss the misdeeds of pastors.

Or perhaps Caner's words above were just a divine prophetic moment, now revealed by God on my blog. Or is that just me being narcissistic?

Irony:  Caner warned about the evils of Christian lawsuits.

"Everybody is obsessed with their rights. You know why we know this? Because everbody is suing everybody else. We're a litigious society, aren't we? Everybody's got a right to sue!! I got a right to get me some cheese!!! I'm gonna get me some cheddar!!! I'm gonna get me my money!!  Why? Because it can't be my fault! It's not my fault, I'm a victim...if I'm a victim, I'm not culpable. If I'm not culpable, I'm not responsible. If I'm not responsible, it's not sin. So what we do instead of bowing our knee in repentance, is we demand our rights. And it has infected the church." (50:10 mark)

I guess Ergun Caner had a change in heart on lawsuits replacing repentance and responsibility and culpability. 

Baloney: Caner claimed to debate various groups, and that they are available online.

"You can get everyone one of my - I have two rules when I debate. Number one, no money. You know why? Because they say we're always after money. And I work for Jerry Falwell. Right? The second rule is no Christian can ask me a question. No money, you can download all my debates. I debate the gay church, I've debated B'Hai, Buddhists, Shintos, Orasthean (?), Muslims." (48:45 mark)

So here it is, unmistakable - Caner is claiming not to have had informal debates, as in one-on-one conversations. But these would have been recorded, uploaded, available for downloading, debates with multiple religious groups.

Where are these formal debates? Did they ever occur? Was this just a simple "misstatement"? He thought he had debated but forgot that they hadn't occurred yet?  He had a few dates wrong? Or was he purposely misleading the Georgia pastors about his debating prowess? I think we know the answer.

Hypocrisy:  Caner claims his debates are free, offered online, and would not want any money for them.

The rest of the quote from above:

"The second rule is no Christian can ask me a question. No money, you can download all my debates. I debate the gay church, I've debated Baha'i, Buddhists, Shintos, Orasthean (?), Muslims. You get 'em all. They're free, they will always be free. Why? Because I like a good debate, and I like the church in culture."

That is great! He doesn't want to charge for his recorded debates, and he claims to want them available to everyone everywhere, available for downloading on the Internet. Thus, he wants them to have as wide of dissemination as possible, unhindered by the need to pay for them. He throws in the point that he is already being paid a salary so why try to charge more money.

If he claimed in 2007 that he wants his debates to be spread via the Internet unhindered, why would he object to sermons? Why would he object to his excellent speech given to the Marines in 2005  being posted on the Internet? And more importantly: why would he now claim that he wants compensation from Jon Autry and Jason Smathers for doing what he said he himself does or rather claims to do: puts his debates online for free for anyone to download?

So there you have it. Something for everyone.

And I'll leave you with one other quote from the Georgia Baptist Evangelism Conference of 2007, that only Ergun Caner gets a pass on:

"I don't think the Tele-Tubbies are gay. I think Barney [the dinosaur] is queer." (48:45 mark)

And did the Georgia boys ever yuck it up over that one.

And listen to the sermon for yourself right here:

Happy Thanksgiving from the Watchdog - And Update on Ergun Caner Lawsuits

Happy Thanksgiving from the Watchdog! Hope all of my readers enjoy some turkey and stuffing and football, but don't overdo it! You'll regret it tomorrow!

I'm thankful today for the many faithful readers of this blog, now starting its 7th year. And I am very thankful for the many friends I've made along the way. And thankful for no door knocks on Thanksgiving Eve this year!

While I'm getting ready to feast on a turkey bone, I did want to give an important update on the Ergun Caner lawsuits that broke yesterday on Jason Smathers' blog here. As most of you know, earlier this year Ergun Caner did file a lawsuit against pastor Jason Smathers, and Liberty University grad Jonathan Autry for copyright infringement related to their posting of the most damning video of Ergun Caner speaking to the U.S. Marines in 2007.

It seems there is finally some movement in the case, as some court filings have been made by the defense. Please take time to read Jonathan Autry's pleading with the court. If you've followed the Ergun Caner case over the past three years, and wonder what kind of "Man of God" could mislead congregations for an entire decade, read this filing and things about Ergun Caner will make sense - in a sick sort of way. Read it. Carefully. It is disturbing. I have embedded the document below, or you can hyperlink to it here.

Jonathan and Jason have very different legal representation. Because of the significant first amendment and "Freedom of Information Act" implications of Smathers' case, he is being represented by Kel McClanahan of the National Security Counselors just outside of Washington, DC. Jonathan on the other hand, can't afford legal representation and his younger brother is defending him.

Kel McClanahan's brief to the court to support their motion to dismiss Caner's lawsuit is also interesting reading. It is one thing to read some blogger like myself popping off about Caner's deceptions. It is another thing altogether to read a long court filing written by a great legal mind, summarizing many of the events we have blogged about since the transformation of Butch Caner into Ergun Mehmet Giovonni Caner on 9/11 - it is carefully footnoted and detailed, arguing to the court the merit-less claims of Caner's copyright assertions. I have also embedded this court filing below as well.

Have a great Thanksgiving everyone!

Caner vs. Autry DECLARATION OF JONATHAN AUTRY by Jason Smathers

Caner vs Autry et al. Brief in Support of Motion to Dismiss, Or, in the Alternative, for Summary Judgment by Jason Smathers

Ten Commandments of When It May Be Time to Stop Giving Money to Your Mega Church

Readers - last month the Wartburg Watch posted an excellent article that included some basic rules or principles of when it is time for Christians to stop giving money to their local church. Their article was posted in the context of the Steven Furtick mansion story, but I am going to summarize these principles and add a few more of my own to make what I will call "The Ten Commandments of When It May Be Time to Stop Giving Money to Your Mega Church."

I know many of you right now are rolling your eyes. You're saying "There he goes again - telling people to not give to the church." No, that is not what I'm saying. If you are a member of a church, you SHOULD support it financially. However, if you're a member of a mega church and you see some of the following trends in YOUR church, perhaps God wants you to start using your money to make an impact in other areas. Perhaps God wants you to start channeling your resources into organizations that are more in line with the values of your Christian faith. Maybe God wants you to support your church at a lower financial commitment to free up money for you to give to other organizations.

Here is what the Dee and Deb at the Wartburg Watch said as they laid out their principles of when it is time to stop giving to your church:

"Are you, church contributor, vaguely discontented by what your money actually supports? Do you ever wonder if your money supports anything of eternal value? If you are a member of a church with a well paid pastor, and you see any of the following, maybe you should consider giving your money elsewhere."

Here we go:

1. Stop giving if you cannot find out your pastor's salary and compensation package.  I've been saying this for six years. Complete transparency is essential. Most mega churches go to great lengths to keep salaries of the top dog ministers a dark secret, and for good reason. They know that if the average church member knew of the compensation packages of the pastor and his family, they would be so disgusted that many would stop giving altogether.

2. Stop giving if your well paid pastor lives better than most of the congregation.  As Dee and Deb said:  "Drive by his house. See what kind of car he drives. See what kind of vacation he takes. Think about it."  Of course, if he lives in a gated community it might be hard to drive by it, but you can look it up on Google maps and you can look it up on the property appraiser's website. Don't be ignorant on how well your Man of God lives using the money church members give for God's work.

3. Stop giving if your pastor regularly complains about how hard his job is. I am sick of hearing mega church pastors complain about how hard their job is, and making statements like "you should try having my job for a day"....and you see them living a jet-setting lifestyle, and operating their church as a family business. If he complains about his job publicly to the congregation, you can bet he is going to be lobbying the trustees privately for even more mega-money to make his ministry more tolerable.

4. Stop giving when your money goes to more buildings, expensive equipment, and well-off pastors. If you see the money going to expand the church into other locations when the current location is at a fraction of capacity - at the same time they are ruthlessly firing underpaid faithful ministers - it might be time to reconsider your financial commitment to your church. Remember, giving to your church is NOT giving to God. Your mega church is a 501(c)3 religious business - you might be closer giving to God by giving to the Red Cross than to your church if they are using the money unwisely.

5. Stop giving money if your well paid pastor writes books on church time and then gets all of the proceeds. Many mega church celebrity pastors get paid to prepare their sermons as the most important aspect of their job - then they turn around and turn these sermons into books for which the profits go straight to the pastor and not the church.

6. Stop giving if your well paid pastor is double and triple dipping. Is your pastor constantly traveling during the week to speak and conferences and retreats? Does he regularly take time off to lead trips to Israel or luxury cruises? Does your pastor use church resources like the church website and church media resources to promote trips and cruises "with the pastor"?

7. Stop giving if your pastor operates the church as a family business, regularly hiring and promoting family members. Nepotism is rampant in almost every mega church in Jacksonville. Nepotism hurts an organization in the long run - especially those periods when there are staff reductions and the faithful, qualified long-time staff members get the boot while the pastor's family members get a pass and maybe a promotion.

8. Stop giving if your church has developed a culture of silencing or shaming questioners.  If leadership of your church expects people to just be sheep and blindly follow and fund the pastor's "vision" - you might want to close your pocketbook. You might see regular church members telling other people on social media to not talk openly about the problems of the church, or accusing those discussing their concerns as spreading "gossip", "innuendo", and "vitriol". Ignore them. Discuss the issues on social media. And use your checkbook to speak - it is the loudest voice you have, and the one that the leadership of church is most concerned about.

9. Stop giving if your pastor routinely tells you that you are obligated to "tithe to the storehouse" to receive God's blessings and avoid God's cursings. This is a recent phenomena in evangelicalism - trying to fool Christians into thinking they must fork over at least 10% of all their income to redeem their money, that God will "rebuke the devourer" if you give 10%. The reality is the New Testament calls Christians to give generously and cheerfully. You are free to give according to your conscience - and you are free NOT to give to your church but to other causes that are consistent with your Christian beliefs.

10. Stop giving if your church is super-focused on expanding their territory into wealthy areas of the city, and under-focused on helping the poor and needy in your city. Most - not all - mega churches have almost zero interest in helping the poor in their cities, but are interested in making land purchases and renovating their auditoriums and tapping markets of the wealthy.

Maybe you have a number 11. or 12. that you would like to add - if so I want to hear from you. Maybe you are a member of a church that exhibits some of these traits and you want to discuss it here. Maybe these don't characterize your church and you want to tell us about it. Chime in.

I'll leave you with a quote from Dee and Deb:

"How about rescue missions that reach out to the unloved? There are ministries that look after persecuted people groups or victims of human trafficking. I bet each of you know quite a few. I know such ministries would be thrilled with your donation and you might feel like your have done something worthwhile and eternal. Your money would actually do more good with these groups than the purchase of one more Bose speaker for Sunday morning."